Friday, May 5, 2017

Day 15: Let go, Chetan.

When she takes her time to drink 
a barely warm cup of tea, let her. 
She's given her time 
to cook your meal 
and serve it to you 
before she sat to drink her tea.

And what about
get up and cook 'your' meal,
and serve yourself,
because it's 'your' meal?
Or if that's too difficult for you,
my writer boy?

"When she takes time to select 
a dish from the menu, let her. 
Every day, for every meal 
she has prepared 
she has given her time 
to think about what to make, 
how much, and for whom.

And what tells you 
that you have the right 
to not let her take her time 
to decide what she wants 
to eat, in the first place?
That she deserves that time
only because she gives up her time
to think about your food?
And not because she just wants 
to think about what she wants to eat?
You recognise how absurd that sounds?

"When she takes time to dress up 
to go out with you, let her. 
She has given her time to make sure 
that your ironed clothes are in their place 
and knows better than you, 
where your socks are. 
She has dressed up 
her child thoughtfully, 
to look like the child who is
most smartly dressed up around.

What about ironing your own cloths,
knowing where you keep your socks,
helping out in dressing up 
not just "her" child but your too?

"When she takes time 
to watch TV mindlessly, let her. 
She is only half concentrating 
and has a clock ticking in her head. 
As soon as it's nearing dinner time, 
you'll see her disappear to get things ready.

You are just going to see her 
disappear to get things ready?
What about moving your ass 
and help in getting things ready?

"When she takes time 
to serve you breakfast, let her. 
She has kept aside 
the burnt toast for herself 
and is taking the time 
to serve her family 
the nicest ones she could manage.

Serve you breakfast?
Like who you are? 
some lord to be served?
What about making your own?
And once in a while 
sharing that burnt toast, 
since you know there's one 
that she is keeping aside?

"When she takes time 
after her tea to just sit by the window 
and stare into nothingness, let her. 
It's her life, she's given you 
countless hours of her life..
Let her take a few minutes for herself.
She's rushing through her life, 
giving chunks of her time 
whenever needed, wherever needed. 
Don't rush her more 
than she rushes herself. 
Don't push her harder 
than she pushes herself.
*Let her take her time*

Dear Chetan,
You know what you should let her do?

First, let her smack 
the paternalistic, patronising, 
and patriarchal man out of you.
So that next time you care to 'let her' 
do things out of your charity, 
you know what's your real place is!
And then, let her shake
the fake feminist out of you,
who first thought, then wrote
and published such an unabashedly 
entitled misogynistic piece. 

And then, If you really care,
let go of your power, 
to let others do
or no do things.
Let go of your arrogance,
that you are the one 
to let her be or not be 
the way she may want to be.
Let go of your misconceptions
that she is there to serve you
feed you, clean you, dress you,
in short, baby-sit you.
Let go of your laziness - 
or is it your in capability?
to not do your own work,
in that house of yours and hers,
and within your mind and heart!

Finally let go of the notion 
that you can... let her. 

- This is written in response to Let Her Take Her Time, a post by Chetan Bhagat, a banker-turned-writer from India. The black font is the original piece. The blue font texts are some of the comments on the post interspersed with my own opinion. 

#Day15 #The100DayProject #100DaysOfProseToPoetry #Gender Chetan Bhagat #LetHer

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